I have truly been MIA, because all the great “material” I have gathered to write about here, along this “journey” with my mother (it is a journey, her health care aide reminds) is becoming too painful to write about.
I keep a rough log of moments but don’t seem to have the perseverance or focus to shape these moments into actual posts. Maybe I need to start drawing again–my mother, who has now descended into quite deep depths of dementia, said to me yesterday as I was going through an old photo album with her, that I should “sketch your memories;” we have a long history of having taken vacations together in New England, and as she is an artist and I have always been drawing, we would spend long afternoons in fields sketching mountains and trees.
When I was growing up, we summered in Vermont, and somewhere I have photos of her sketching old tree stumps, a favorite subject of hers. I’m not sure what sketching my memories will translate into for me. But there is wisdom in the things she can say to me these days. As when we were talking about her years as an artists, all her paintings which she doesn’t remember are still in her studio, and she said “Well, it’s all in the process, anyway.”
Anyway, mustering myself for a bit of self-promo to keep afloat: today I am a guest over at a dear friend’s blog – a blogger who is a terrific writer. So if you’d like to visit an old post of mine, back before my mother’s dementia, when I was still able to write with some humor about this “journey,” you can read it here:
http://www.menopausalmom.com/2014/09/wacky-wednesday-guest-post-by-sandra.html Love to all my readers, and I will try to find my way back here in whatever form calls me. Thank you for all your support as this journey with my mother seems finally be reaching its frail end.